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Friday, April 30, 2021

The Pigeon Wears Combat Boots

 

The dirty bird is at it again. And this time, he's really, really mired in the mud. The Canadian Armed Forces sexual harassment reckoning has proved once and for all that the battle of the sexes is the ugliest form of warfare. Would that it also meant there were no pigeons in a foxhole...

. . .

The usual media reports — up until this point, primarily (if not exclusively) coming from Pentagon mole Mercedes Stephenson at Goebbels News — would have you believe that the Catholic Church-level crisis over sexual abuse in the Canadian military is only a problem for Justin Trudeau and his government — in particular, Defence Minister Harjit Sajjan and for whatever reason, Chief of Staff Katie Telford.
 
But a closer look reveals what the partisan hacks of the MSM won't go into detail about, in their breathless quest to make something sleazy "stick" on Justin Trudeau in the absence of an actual blue dress in his office that doesn't exist. Namely, that the problem is endemic and transcends partisanship — but also, that none other than Stephen Harper and his troglodyte Tories left another land mine for the government that followed.
 
So last Friday, while Justin and Sophie were getting their first Tru-Doses and the cobra chickens of the twittersphere were all squawking nonsense about their relationship, the Blackwater bros on the defence committee were grilling a former staffer on their current favoured conspiracy theory, that the Trudeau government engaged in a supposed "coverup" of inappropriate behaviour involving high-ranking General Jonathan Vance. (He is the very model of a pervy maple general.)
 
The staffer in question, a fellow named Elder Marquesnever actually said that the complaints registered to various departments were of a sexual nature, but that he presumed they could have been — and that he intended to keep Katie Telford appraised of any new information if it came up.
 
Thing is, the former military ombudsman tasked with investigating also said previously that there wasn't any formal complaint to follow up on.
 
But the cons' ears perked up immediately upon hearing those magic words — Katie Telford! — as "proof" that Trudeau himself not only knew about Vance's behaviour but conspired with the nefarious "centre" in the PMO to cover it up. Supposedly, we are to believe (or Andrew Coyne does anyway, because there's no conspiracy theory about his hated cousin that he won't latch onto) that this was because Trudeau also faced allegations of a similar nature around the same time (if you believe Wormtongue Kinsellout, that is), and/or that they needed Vance on side to "railroad" a decorated officer acting ever so honourably as a whistleblower for other aspects of purported Liberal "corruption".
 
The thing about both the Vance and Mark Norman cases is that they actually have Harper's fingerprints all over them (or cat paws). But the MSM only reports one side of the story, pretending that who was left holding the bag is who was actually at fault.
 
So of course, now that this guy testified on one fake scandal, Skippy et. al. want to haul him in for that other one, because if it wasn't for WeGhazi, they'd have nothing.
 
Now, I don't know anything about this guy, but I'm going to offer some conjecture of my own — and again, this is just a personal "pet" theory. I certainly hope to be proven wrong.
 
It's conceivable that because he worked in Morneau's office, that there are some holdover loyalists who weren't happy with the way the whole resignation happened, or the circumstances. Officials in Finance had reportedly been having friction with the PMO for some time, which apparently came to a head when Morneau's pick for Bank of Canada governor (a white male) was elevated over Telford's (a woman, who would be the first woman in that position). So when Morneau left at the height of the WeGhazi fracas (there were other disagreements besides that matter), his replacement was, of course, Chrystia Freeland, the first woman FM — and evidently, Katie's pick.
 
Now I'm not saying Morneau is a misogynist. But the Finance realm more broadly is of course, a traditionally old boys' club, as is the military. The reaction from that man cave of money men and peen-possessor pundits to Chrystia Freeland's herstory-making budget last week was tepid at best and... shall we say, "testerical" at worst. Ranting and raving about deficits and scaring the public into believing that it's the absolute worst thing in the world, instead of focusing on what's actually being paid for — in other words, obsessing about the cost of everything and the value of nothing.
 
What better way to knock her out of the spotlightand all the good press for a budget aimed at leveling the playing field for the post-pandemic economy, than by knocking the feminist prime minister for a loop and painting him as a hypocrite? Just like they did (or tried to do) with Jodygate, only worse this time because it involves actual sex. The endgame being to dampen the rock-solid support from women that the Liberals have been enjoying for six years and counting, even if they'll never convince women to support the fetus-fetishist party themselves.
 
(And moreover, there apparently was some tension over Trudeau and Freeland teaming up with Mark Carney to design the economic recovery plan, so there remains a further possibility that all the press attention over the LPC Convention that led up to the budget didn't sit well with some people either.)
 
But again, this is purely my own theory based on what I know about LPC backroom infighting involving exiled finance ministers, minority governments, and a depraved, scandal-hungry opposition desperate to go after a popular yet polarizing PM. Marques might be an intentional troll or he might just be an unfortunate stooge, an NPC.
 
Which brings us to the war pigeon and his clandestine operation.
 
If you're not doing so already, go follow @MsAmyMcPherson on Twitter and pay attention to her blog, Free the Press Canada — it's a treasure trove of in-depth reporting on the so-called "scandals" (read: hit jobs) concocted by the Canadian right-wing, their press friendlies, and in some cases, their American backers. She used to be a journalist with the CBC before they became the Click Bait Corporation aka Conrad Black Corporation. Now she's independent, a truth-teller (or as Jake Tapper would have it, a Tru-Anon), which is why the MSM wants nothing to do with her research (but will give oxygen to cranks like Jesse Brown and Vivian Krause).
 
What Amy has discovered is that this whole thing was yet another setup and that Skippy has a lot to do with it. I can't wait to see her full investigation. I want to read it even though I'm angry it'll go nowhere.
 
Recall that it was Skippy who took a particular sadistic pleasure in grilling the unflappable Telford over the WeGhazi nonsense the first go-around. Now the Cons want to haul back Telford yet again to smear her even worse over the Vance matter — in other words, "standing up for women" by publicly abusing another woman. (I digress of course, but the Bloc is in on this too — how convenient once again for the alleged no-goodnik Yves Blanc Cheque, who also wanted Telford le fired, to point fingers at Trudeau vis-a-vis "vous, aussi.". Éric Lapointe must be so proud.)
 
It's also Skippy who can't get any traction against Freeland on his own, so of course, let's bring in a woman to hide behind.
 
It's also worth noting that the Q sphere that conjured up that same nonsense about Justin and Sophie and was pushing WeGhazi as the Canadian version of "Clinton Cash" (which later morphed into Pizzagate, and that into QAnon) has been trying for the longest time to paint the LPC as a "fake feminist cult" and Trudeau as its Keith Rainere (for no other reason than the idiot Bronfman girls' uncle Steve is a key LPC fundraiser), with Telford its Allison Mack or Ghislaine Maxwell.
 
You know who was pushing Q crap about Telford and her husband when that crap was going down? You guessed it, Frank Stallone Pigeon Poilievre. The base eats this stuff up like pigeons take to shit.
 
Thing is, it's not just Skippy who is implicated in this. He's one of a few at the forefront. It's also O'Toole himself — and his backer, Jason Kenney. Premier of the province known to be the laboratory for Canadian Republican American Plutocrat (CRAP) fascism — and current employer of Harper fils.
 
When the first problems about Vance showed up, they were Stephen Harper's veterans' affairs minister and defence minister, respectively. Two more cogs in the old-boy network (and Kenney a friggin' incel at that). If the names John Baird and Jamie Watt don't mean anything to you, you haven't been paying attention. But neither has the MSM. Which is why the whole apparatus is going above and beyond to get rid of the prime minister who's doing what he can with the limited tools he has, to hold them accountable. In favour of one of their own. Operation Dishonour indeed.
 
The thing is, the military police themselves pushed to close off the Vance matter during the Harper government, while O'Toole apparently followed the same protocols that Sajjan did in addressing it, even as the Cons try to get his head on a platter for a supposed "cover-up." Just like they want to get Telford's, as they claimed Gerry Butts during the Lavghazi hit job — because their ultimate target is, of course, Trudeau. If they can scalp a brown guy in a turban and the PMO consigliere who happens to be a woman while they're chewing away at the rest of Trudeau's team, all the better.
 
But the facts are clear: Harper knew. Harper did nothing. Only Trudeau wears the blame, though, because of course, the perky Pravda propagandist at Shaw-Corus conveniently has amnesia about anything prior to 2016.
 
And, just out of curiosity... since Brivanagate set a precedent, and those in the ranks of Liberal Twitter were "just asking questions" about Mercedes' own personal contacts with one of O'Toole's few good men — though she denies it, of course — have we ever gotten any independent confirmation of who's telling the truth? Because the way I see it, all you militant mercenaries of the media mafia
 

What's really distasteful is that an actual victims' advocacy group pleaded with all politicians to stop using their experiences as cynical campaign fodder to score dunks on the government or push their preferred agenda. (Like the NDP, a segment of which apparently wants to abolish the military altogether.) That's what the Liberals tried to do a few weeks ago; nevertheless, the Axis of Evil persisted, and so here we are.

Fortunately, Sajjan announced yesterday that a highly respected former Supreme Court Justice turned prosecutor at the International Criminal Court, Louise Arbour, is going to take charge of how the recommendations in a previous report should be implemented going forth. Marie Deschamps, the author of that earlier report who was also a Supreme Court Justice, welcomed Ms. Arbour's leadership on the file and looked forward to seeing how she would broaden its scope. An actual serious project rather than the narcissistic showboating at the committees.

But the punditry, of course, was quick to react that the government was just kicking the can and deflecting responsibility. Well, OK then. Can't win for losing, I guess. Sock man bad, and also, turban man bad. Might as well do nothing, then, which is exactly what the axis of evil wants.
 
One last note: the guy over at Simon's blog who obsesses about polls more than even the most hardcore politics junkies seems to be convinced that the numbers are showing doom and gloom for the Liberals, because they "can't stay out of controversy." No, what happens is that they get shit flung at them and the media breathlessly reports that they should stop running into shit. But considering the circumstances, they're doing pretty good, and an actual campaign should see them do even better. I expect a hit to come in like clockwork next week, because of the smear job, but I don't expect this to be deciding ballot question in September. One word: Pandemic. I rest my case.

Ultimately, change will come in this institution, while the QAnonservatives exploiting people for their sick personal gains will just have to go back to the Fuhrerbunkers in mom's basement and start over. The feminist government of the Trudeau Liberals, meanwhile... will continue to soldier on.



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Saturday, April 24, 2021

His Better Half

 

A very merry weekend birthday to the First Lady of Canada, Sophie Grégoire Trudeau! As I said yesterday, haters gonna hate, but how could you not love these two? (Don't answer that — and whatever you do, never read the comments.) What better way to celebrate than with a COVID shot? And cake...

. . .

Sophie — singer, activist, wife, mom, daughter, proponent of "authenticity, kindness, and love" — is 46 today. And since Justin, after all, is the 23rd PM, that effectively makes her... his better half. (Or him, the better half, and she the better times two?)

It's been a helluva year for our Sophie, from COVID to a cancer scare and her own dad undergoing treatment, to.... whatever the hell the Pigeon has been up to on his conspiracy bender for no good reason at all. Nevertheless, she persisted, and I'm glad to see she's still going strong. Them too, together.

You know, the name Justin comes from a Roman emperor, Justinian, who commissioned the construction of a very famous cathedral for his wife Theodora — who was also a singer, actress and socialite. Its name translates as the Temple of Wisdom, for which he felt she was the embodiment of.

You know it today as the Hagia Sophia.

By the way: a philosopher, translates as someone who loves wisdom, or someone who loves... Sophia.

It'd be incredibly romantic if Justinian the philosopher-king could have a magnificent temple built for his Sophia (or even a garage at the summer home, geez). At least in those days the emperor didn't have an annoying pigeon (or a Turkey) over his shoulder, squawking about the price of everything and the value of nothing.

Anyway. Have a good weekend and a very happy birthday, Sophie. Rest up, feel better, and have fun.



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Friday, April 23, 2021

Zeneca, The Younger

 

Justin and Sophie got their AZ jabs today in Ottawa. Yay! They should be applauded for jumping on the #GenXZeneca bandwagon to discourage hesitancy. But even though COVID resistance finally seems to be abating, the conspiracy cranks just have to have some other poison pill to feed their heads...

. . .

Twitter was all agog over the headline today because press outlets used this photo for their story, which apparently the stupids didn't actually read, nor did they watch the actual vaccine event taking place. The reason being they're convinced, without any shred of evidence whatsoever, that Justin and Sophie are split up and he's only pretending to be married, but Han is actually flying Solo without Leia in tow.

Like I said, without any shred of evidence. May the farce be with you.
 
Yes, Sophie has been a lot less visible lately, and was off-camera for the headline photo, but it's because of QMorons and sausage handlers like this. If they had actually paid attention and watched it on TV instead of reacting to the story they would have seen that Sophie was right there.


What was it Jean Chrétien used to say? A proof is a proof, and when you have a proof, that means it's proven. So here's your proof.

Nope, that's not enough proof. Now they're moving the goalposts for some other confirmation of their beliefs, and it is... uh, hand play? Oh, for the love of St. Pierre, they're back on the Bizarro Donald kick again. Translation, from the Dumass dialect of French:
Little Melania-esque moment as Justin Trudeau tries to take Sophie's hand while she's getting the vaccine and she pushes him away.
You know, I'm sick and tired of this. The woman gets sick with a serious illness (and had a breast-cancer scare on top of that). Her dad is in cancer treatment too. Her mother-in-law, who suffers from bipolar depression, narrowly escaped a house fire. Heavily-armed assholes are crashing their pickup trucks into the family home to go rescue the mole children they supposedly trafficked from Tom Hanks, and these complete absolute idiots still won't shut up about WE Day or the secret dungeon at Harrington Lake or projection of their other sexual fantasies. Thanks in large part to a Rupert Murdoch smear floated by Robert Fife. So she hides off screen to stay away, or she makes only sporadic appearances in public, because she knows that the "establishment" sides with the sausage handlers and she doesn't want to end up the real-life version of Kathy Stabler.
 
Duh. Wouldn't you want to hide in an underground bunker after all this?
 
And no, for the record, Chrystia is not Olivia. QAnon is fan fiction and fan fiction is not real life.

Look, I like Justin as a lot of other people do. He's a good-looking guy! But am I under the delusion that slashfic or headcanons or daydreams about him are actually real? No, of course not, which is why I'm a TruAnon and not a QAnon. The important syllable being "Tru" as in facts and reality. Not reality TV, not manufactured gossip or steadfast belief in heavily slanted hit pieces as infallible gospel. If that were where I stood, I'd work for CNN. Or Postmedia, or Fox. Which, I mean.. not that there's much difference these days. Jake Tapper can't have my number and neither can Brivana Trump.
 
And, you know, if they'd bothered to wait they would have seen who actually needed the hand-hold.


Guy can take punches in the boxing ring and even get a tattoo but gets squeamish having his Fauci Ouchie. Aw, he's sensitive! What's wrong with that? Sophie's had three kids... compared to childbirth, a little pinch in the forearm is nothing. (It's one of many reasons why I'll never procreate. I have such a low pain threshold I can't even squeeze a damn pimple without bawling.)

I got my first shot, a Moderna, earlier this month. Contrary to what the doomsayers would have people believe, Canada and the U.S. actually are on track to finish up at about the same time. In fact, considering yesterday was Earth Day, I think it's prudent to say that the whole world might be further along were it not for disinfo being spread like so much organic manure. That goes for COVID, and for climate change. Instead we've got untold numbers of morons and self-interested JAQoffs profiting from the production of bullshit, furthering fake news instead of facts. It's the George Costanza model of journalism, claiming that manure is really not that bad.


I give it about a week until they start claiming that Sophie is either missing or dead and this "Melania" is a doppelganger. You know, a Falsedeau instead of a True-deau. Seriously, go read about the clone people. (Search "clone" in that article.) It's... um....
 
 
What this is, is they just can't quit the Former Guy and the comfortable lies he gave people free licence to believe. Like how they're already claiming that the only reason they're holding hands is to cover up not wearing a wedding ring. Except, uh...


Well, then... it's not a wedding ring! It's the ring of Sauron! And so it goes.

Take a good weekend off, you two, and rest up. Drink plenty of Gatorade. Fool around a little bit. Have breakfast (and anything else you want) in bed.

Socks.

Kinky boots, bedroom slippers, and lots and lots of hot socks. Gen-X rated, for mature audiences only.

Now that's what I call Tru Love.
 

 
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Tuesday, April 20, 2021

She Works Hard for the Money

 

Though she is little, she is quite fierce! Now that's what I call a confidence vote. Chrystia Freeland's precedent-setting budget tabled yesterday was a truly impressive feet — er, feat. Not just for the what but the who and the why. So let's take a look inside! O Canada, Freeland Strong and Tru'...

. . .

Freeland, as #cdnpoli observers well know, is not only Canada's first female Deputy Prime Minister but the first female Finance Minister. That's yuge to finally have a woman in charge of, well, the nation's purse strings, and it's in keeping with the Tru Grits' commitment to "Add women, change politics." Which is why the stuffy old men of the news "business" — the profession where she once worked, as a journalist with The Financial Times — were and are so quick to try and undercut her. (Which is not to say that Mr. Ivana Pravdavich qualifies as a "journalist," but there ya go.)

In fact, not long after she started delivering a herstory-making speech in the HoC, the press cut away to Dumbfuck O'Toole to get his reaction. Like we really fucking need to watch another tantrum from a stupid white guy. (Narrator: We did not fucking need to watch another tantrum from a stupid white guy.)

But just in case you were curious, here's his reaction. 

 


I dunno if it's just the contrast on the TV or if he's finally showing his true party colours, but he's looking a bit orange there with that shit-eating grin, rather like the Former Guy he seeks to emulate. (Or Johnny Boner. But I digress.)

Anyway, now back to our regularly-scheduled awesomesauce. Oh, and by the way, those heels that she's wearing to stomp on those garbage old men, were designed by a female small-business owner, whose hard work Mme. Freeland has chosen to highlight and support. I didn't know there was a "new shoe" tradition for Canadian Budget Day but she just made it infinity times more fabulous. (But comfy, practical sneakers work just as well too.)

So what's in the goodie bag?

Well, the big takeaway from yesterday of course was

📣 PUBLICLY-FUNDED 📣

📣 AFFORDABLE 📣

📣 UNIVERSAL CHILDCARE 📣

Because it's 2021.

Dale Smith has a good roundup, because wait, there's more:

The budget was released yesterday, and lo, the commitment to child care was huge – $30 billion over five years in order to build a national system of $10/day early learning and child care, which is huge money – money that will make it very, very hard for provinces to refuse. It’s not going to be immediate, but a process to build to that system, which they have already put work into over the past five years, but it’s a much more robust commitment than we have seen in the past. It means more negotiations with provinces, however, as well as an asymmetrical agreement with Quebec so that they can still get funding to augment their existing subsidised child care system.

More from Dale in his latest at Loonie Politics, plus a video on how the current Liberal government might actually be able to push childcare through this time.


In addition to childcare, the 2021 budget offers investments in climate, housing, Indigenous communities, taxes on rich people's toys and the Big Brother internet juggernauts, a "full suite" of reproductive healthcare services, adjustments to student loans, $400M to combat sexual abuse in the military (take that, concern trolls on the Defence committee), important investments in biotech research so that the next time there's a pandemic (and there will be a next time), Canada and the WHO won't get fooled again...

What's that John Ivison? How's that crow ye eating, ye fanny? Tastes like chicken, no? I hope it leaves a bad taste in your mouth and you get nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea.

How it started:


 How it's going:

If you're so inclined and you've got no plans this weekend, you can read the budget either as a 730-page (!) PDF or a scrollable HTML page, and the online preamble and Chrystia's address before Parliament. Or you can watch it. She has a really nice necklace on, but it's her delusional detractors who are clutching their pearls.

Because what's really great about this budget is how groundbreaking it is (like a pair of stilettos, puncturing the pavement and grinding the patriarchy into rubble), and yet... how sensible, like a working mom's pair of track shoes. That's our Chrystia, the Reebok Princess. (See also, Kamala's Chucks and Pearls.)

Which of course doesn't preclude the usual idiot extremists of both the Cons and the Dipshits from complaining about it. And about Chrystia. She's either a spendthrift and a redistributive communist who's destroying the deficit with her high heels, or a Nazi dominatrix about to stomp on the face of the oppressed for all eternity with either her Manolos or her Sauconys. Both things can be true, of course, because Canada has no serious opposition who aren't drunk on Twitter partisan conspiracy theory Kool-Aid. They also have more "issues" than the back catalogue of Canadian Geographic. It's almost like they want her to spank them with a rolled-up copy of The Economist. (Especially Pigeon Pete.) But Liberals are Tru-Anons, right? Say no to political cults!

In short, this is the opposition's response. Highly illogical indeed.


I mean, I'm not gonna lie: I do love that she triggered the rose bros by investing in the Memorial to the Victims of Communism. Because what better way to distinguish yourself as a sensible normal person than by responding to right-wing attacks that you're a tankie by saying "no, communism is bad and it kills people, so here's some public investment to show that we mean it," only to have the actual tankies respond with "gulags for centrist shitlibs are good actually, and I am very smart."

Clowns to the left of her, jokers to the right. The Elf on the Shelf is a Jedi master troll. Chef's.... kiss.


Anyway, that's my read on the #GirlBoss budget. You can go peek at some of the other responses to this, like Liberal strategist and Herle Burly podcaster Scott Reid's smart take on the "framing" of the budget and the NDP's disingenuousness about the infamous no-confidence vote of 2005 that killed off Paul Martin's government and with it, the Liberals' childcare framework for a whole decade of darkness. Or conservatives like Sean Speer and Danielle Kubes crying like babies in need of, well, childcare to put them in timeout. Once you're done laughing at the cons, read some intelligent analysis from Anne Casselman at The Walrus and the always no-nonsense nice guy Aaron Wherry at CBC Politics. There's sure to be more dribs and drabs as the budget debate kicks off and with it, the real countdown to Election 44. So stay tuned, and filter out the signal from the noise.

And let this be a reminder to the fringe loonies aiming their small peen machines at Canada's next Girl Boss: She works hard for the money, so you better damn well treat her right.



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Why, I know a fine fancy letter called FUDDLE. I use it in spelling Miss Fuddle-dee-Duddle. And, oh! What a bird-of-a-bird-of-a-bird-of! Her tail is the longest that’s ever been heard of.

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About (er, Aboot, eh)

The world needs more Canada. Especially the elephant in the bed. I'm an American observer peeking over the hedge, writing about Canadian politics and culture — including foreign relations with its nearest (and most unpredictable) neighbour — from my unlucky perch south of the 49th parallel.

Frequent Former (for now?) commenter at Wonkette (as the Girl Guide, resident south-of-the-border Trudeau stan) and as Jackie at Simon's blog.

Unapologetic supporter of the Liberal Party of Canada and Team Trudeau (aka the "Tru Grits"), and the Democratic Party USA. (Yes, unapologetic. I'll never say soory for that.)

Proud "Liberal Psycho," according to irascible Maclean's douchebag Stephen Maher, the other political white guy named Maher as annoying and abusive as Bill. Honoured to be a member of Jake Tapper's TruAnon.

I also write The Canadian Fishwrap Project, a media criticism blog. The #CdnMediaFailed, so I'mma keep calling 'em out.

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